Since the video of the elehas begging for alms surfaced online, the reactions of Muslim men have been scanty about it. Why?

The matter is obviously not ignorable!

It needs to be addressed!

I told my sister that they didn’t humiliate Islam by coming out to say they’re suffering and further begging for alms, they humiliated themselves. And of course, no one can humiliate Islam. However, they carry the emblem of Islam which is why Islam will be mentioned anytime and anywhere the video is viewed. We can’t ignore that.

The position of Islam as regards the best place for women being the home still stands, no matter what! Nonetheless, ISLAM DOES NOT FORBID A WOMAN FROM EARNING MONEY. I stand to be corrected!

Islam does not forbid a woman from acquiring education. Islam does not forbid a woman from having dreams and aspirations. A Muslim woman just needs to follow the guidance of Islam wherever she finds herself.

Staying and working from home is the best decision I have made in my life. Actually, my husband belongs to the school of thought that I can’t be leaving the house and you’d also be leaving the house, so, you need to stay at home and take care of the homefront while I be the provider.

For the first few years of our marriage, I wasn’t earning money of my own and my husband carried all the responsibilities without faltering. Even now that I’m earning my own money, he hasn’t backslid in his duties, alhamdilillah Rabil’Alamin.

Today, I’m thankful to my husband for standing his ground despite the tantrums I threw to work. And it was so easy for me to accept his decision because he’s responsible. I am so proud of that decision despite the heavy criticism I had to face. However, some Muslim women who are asked to stay at home don’t have the same story as mine.

The law of Allah can never be faulty or faulted. The best for a woman is to stay at home. That law is very beautiful. In fact, it is seeking to give women the comfort that they deserve. But the upholders of that law ain’t upholding it the way it’s supposed to be upheld and that’s why there’s a problem. A woman who’s asked not to work needs adequate provision. This provision goes beyond food and shelter alone. It cut across several other valid feminine needs which the husband needs to provide. In the absence of this provision, the upholder of the law is at fault. And tongues are bound to wag that the law of Allah is faulty. Not knowing that it’s the upholder that has made a mess of a beautiful law.

The man is naturally created as the provider while the woman is naturally created as the nurturer. The society doesn’t ever push men to crave to be the nurturer by clamouring to carry pregnancies or breastfeeding a baby. But society pushes a woman to compete with men in his role as a provider. This is one of the disservice that society has done to a woman. A man can’t be the sole provider! They say! Hellooo!! But a woman can be the sole nurturer – carrying the pregnancy alone and breastfeeding the baby alone, right? What a double standard! With this mindset that a man should be assisted in his role as the provider, every woman runs helter skelter to also work and have an earning. This mindset also pushes a woman to be ashamed to spend her husband’s money. She sees herself as incomplete and a liability if she doesn’t have any financial contribution to the family. Some men also see their not-working wives as a liability. Society also sees her as a liability. Whereas, the law of Allah has absolved her of any financial obligations in the home.

Let’s say every Muslim man imbibes the teachings of Islam, then a woman who doesn’t have an earning can relax and allow herself to be taken care of. But sadly, not every Muslim man imbibes the teachings of Islam, that’s why we have a lot of women staying at home and suffering.

The best place for a woman to be is her husband’s house, I reiterate. And if she must work outside of the home, it must be with the full permission of her husband. And she must observe the correct Islamic dressing and etiquettes. As the world has turned into a global village today, It’s not until you go outside to work before you can earn money. You can be in the four walls of your husband’s house and be earning cool cash. You just need to acquire the right knowledge, skills and what have you. However, some Muslim men forbid their wives not only from working outside the house, but also from earning money. And yes, that’s true. And yes, he has the right to do so provided he’s up to the task.

Now, that video that is flying around is a wake up call for Muslim men who forbid their wives from working outside of the home and also forbid them from earning money. No one said you’ve done something wrong, but you just have to cater for her needs .

Her responsibilities is upon the husband. Failure to provide for a woman who’s forbidden from earning money is one of the reasons why such a video is trending.

No gaslighting! Some men tell their wives not to work or earn money but they kill her with emotional abuse – You’re useless! You’re good for nothing! Your staying at home is meaningless! And so on and so forth!

When those kinds of words are coming from a loved one, it can cause low self-esteem and depression.

The bone of contention is that your full housewife should not suffer! We don’t want to see that kind of video again. It’s very embarrassing. We should have ignored it but it’s not ignorable because of the identity of Islam those women carry.

If you’re allowed to work and earn money, carry yourself with dignity.

If you’re not allowed to work and earn money, demand your full rights from him.

If you don’t allow her to work and earn money, you have to provide for all her needs, may Allah provide for you. She mustn’t have any cause to come outside and start begging and disgracing herself.

Earning is better than begging!

Muslim women are not beggars!

We are distinguished!

May Allah reward our sacrifices!

LATEEFAH ADEWUNMI JUMAH – LAJFINGERS